Time to Shell out the Dough for a Remote Control...

So, I don't have a remote control for the tv in my room...And I felt like being lazy tonight and...I don't know how it happened, but the channel got stuck on MTV...and for awhile on VH1...and I feel a little bit dirty, a little bit old, and definitely lazier for not getting up and changing the channel/doing something with my life.
So, there is a lot of crap on tv, and some of it is the kind of crap that makes me want to see what happens next. I feel like I'm back in high school and man, are there a lot of shows out there that make me glad high school is over. Let's recap some of my magical experience. Hulk Hogan has his own reality show...? Wow. He is still looking pretty good and it's nice to know his family can mooch off of his successful career. I saw a glimpse of his publicity stunts with the other old wrestlers I watched growing up (My brothers had this pretty cool thumb wrestler collection we all fought over...it was awesome...we had a wrestling ring and a bunch of plastic/rubber collectable wrestlers we'd wear on our thumbs and have our own matches. It caused a lot of family fights, obviously.) Let's just say that Hogan is aging a lot more gracefully than the other ones.
Moving on, Laguna Beach...what is it? Is it fake? Are the characters real? C'mon, it gave me a headache. Ok, and what about Date my Mom, um...really. Although some of the writing (and it was obviously scripted...) was funny/clever, it is pretty horrible that moms and daughters will exploit each other to get on tv. I can only imagine the stuff my mom would say about me to get me a date. HA. So, one mom had to dress up in a costume to describe her daughter. She chose a pig. Wow, that's love. And you'd be surprised how many people described their daughters as bitchy. Some of the moms were whoreish too...shocker. When you let your mom date your potential date first, and watch her go out in booty shorts, you know you need to get away from sloppy seconds. And finally, there is a show where one person gets to raid three potential dates' homes and see how they live. The places are a mess and they have a spy kit to see if the dates are getting busy in their own rooms. Nice...and this episode rocked cause it was the ghetto edition, in Cali. Fun.
I am ready to turn off the tube and grab a book...I totally forgot what it was like to kill brain cells without the help of alcohol.