Work can hurt.

bloody knees (not joys)
Originally uploaded by joy and pain.

First off, these aren't my knees. I am using this picture because I thought it was hilarious that someone else goes through what I do...I fall A LOT. And it sorta sucks. Well I have been on a non-falling kick recently. I haven't fallen in a long ass time. Unless you count my drunken stupors or almost near falls, wherein I didn't hit the ground, but came awefully close to it.
My story begins at DSW, a pretty cool shoe store. I bought a nifty pair of Puma's that fit just right when I walked around the carpeted store. I bought new white socks to go with my new white shoes and was happy. My feet started hurting the minute I got off the metro. I swear one foot is bigger than the other. Then I realized that the shoes weren't water resistant. Either that or the floor and I don't get along. I came into the service area where we get our drinks and fell on my knees while I was midsentence with another server. I got up in like a second and they didn't think I fell. Well, the big mouth I have, I sung like a canary and told the world, "Whoa. I fell. It's like a friggen slip and slide back here. Wow." Smooth, Joy, smooth. Then later in the evening I approach the service area like a hurricane and phfooop. Right on my knees again. Fuckin-A. This time, more water. And I wasn't as smooth. A different server saw me. Or heard me, because I said "Fuckin-A" out loud...in front of a couple families and anyone near the service area... At that point, it was big joke. Anyone that spilled water I gave the evil eye to and asked if they had a death wish on me. Getting food in the kitchen was a gamble as I slid my way around like a retard. I hate my Puma's and am screwed. They hurt since I have one big ass foot and one regular (?) one and apparently they interfere with my relationship with gravity. I didn't have these issues with my last pair of shoes (I bought them a month ago and they are Diesel, black leather, sweat ass shoes!), which I gave up since the leather and my socks didn't get along and I constantly smelled wet dog (MY FRIGGEN FEET) wherever I went. So, I am stuck, my friends. I came home tonight with sore feet that didn't smell at all! But I seriously have a bloody and bruised knee...Or I can wear the smelly shoes and come home bruise and blood free and smell god-aweful.
At least I have the embarrasment over with. I fell finally, which I do at every job I have ever had...except the magazine. Oh wait, no I fell in the street walking to the office...yeah. Not my finest moment. I guess I will buy some febreeze or heavy duty foot powder and wear the smelly shoes. But in no way will I save face in this situation. I am vertically challenged and will learn to deal.

Beattie Morphs into a Smurf Overnight

So, I weaseled my way out of work last night and picked up the sucker day shift so I could go to Interpol and it was a lot of fun. However I woke up this morning with a big blue stamp imprinted on my face. I either got really drunk and was punched by someone at the show or I slept on my stupid hand and got inked. Whatever the case I scrubbed the death out of my hand and face and am still smurfish. Great.
Oh, and I am turning into a lamewad that never gets phone calls. Ever. Unless I am in a position when I can't or shouldn't pick up the phone. Like at work for instance, or a concert...I got phone calls galore last night, which is typically a night I work, so it's weird that people would call. One of which was my brother, Donny. Great kid...he's apparently winning an award from his university because not only is he an athlete, but he got a 3.4 GPA. And he's morphing into a jock...well, he's been one for awhile, but he can't fit into any of his altered Men's Warehouse suits because they have been altered like 5 times already. So my dad is driving up to see him for a day for Easter and to buy him some new clothes. Must be nice, Donny! Uh, so I am not an athlete and graduated college, but I need some new stuff, Dad...=) So the only reason he calls is cause he has a song stuck in his head and he thinks that I'd know what it was. And he's drunk. Nice combo. I had a brief glimpse of the song, and narrowed it down to a grunge/alternative band from the early 90s. But then I got drunk and forgot the tune. Good luck on the song and the suit, Donny.
Work is great. Unless I am forced by laziness or stupidity to take a cab, in which case I spend half of what I make to get there and back. But it's normally my fault for waking up late and not having time to metro. Other than all the exciting things I just mentioned I have a lazy Saturday off. I hate battling all the tourists and random people who go out on weekends, so I am going to chill at home today. God love those who sleep until 2pm, I am so happy I can sleep in again!

Smokey Merrimaids her Way Through the Weekend

Ah. Today has been great. This is my first day off in 3 weeks. I am so damn happy and slept most of the day. I am still contemplating leaving the house, but I finally cleaned the shithole I call my room. Getting high off tilex while singing along to the Dandy Warhols and Rolling Stones is the perfect way to spend a stormy Sunday...Ok, I can think of better ways, but I am still happy as a clam.
That and my retard dreams are back. I won't go into details, but they are back.
Work is fun and all, but I'm not used to the inconsistency of business. I need to make money, damnit. It definitely feels good to be able to have drinks for free after work and for working in DC again. I am also not working for corporate snobs so I can talk to people any damn way I please, which is awesome. I can give attitute right back to the people who are giving it to me...although I can't help feeling I work in a diner when that situation presents itself.
I have also moved laterally on the smelliness scale. I used to leave work smelling like tacos and I now leave smelling like an ashtray and a campfire mixed together. We have a real fireplace and there is usually always wood burning, hence my outdoorsy smell. I get weird looks from people on the metro...and I know what they are thinking. "Where the hell was she today? I'm pretty sure burning leaves and holding bonfires is illegal in the city..." Hopefully I'll become immune to my own stench soon.
More on that later, I am going to get out of the house.

Guinness Defeats Burritos in a Landslide Victory!

Um. So times...they are a changin. Yo estoy finito en el restaurante de burritos y yo estoy MUY contenta. I am so done with tacos! But I have to say, I am going to miss my staff. I got flowers from the night crew and a few of them actually got all misty and I got hugs...totally not expected. But I am glad that no one wanted me to go. I am so not used to that feeling. :)
I am entering my 3rd week of straight up work and I am really wanting a day off. I am also experiencing college life for the next week as I am approaching a deadline for freelance work for a magazine and I have not begun to write/research the article. Woops. I feel a late night cram session coming on. With all that said, I am a busy girl and liking the change. I am transitioning from a gig where I work all day running around making drinks, serving guests, expoing, cooking, and cashiering to only waiting tables. So much easier...and I am making the green, so I am a happy camper.
My tired ass is hitting the hay. I am serving brunch tomorrow, what fun!