The Long Farewell to Wisconsin

Ah,
The roadtrip was kinda cool. I had one semi-sketchy stop in Pennsylvania (self-serve gas stations are so weird...) that turned out to be cool. I had the weirdest feeling that I was taking part in a creepy horror flick...nothing around for miles...weather beated signs swinging in the wind...scruffy old people with hick accents and no teeth trying to figure out why you'd leave VA for the midwest...Fun.
There's not a whole helluva lot in Ohio, or Indiana, Or Illinois...until you make your way to Chicago, which was a lot of fun to drive through. Unless you really, REALLY love fields, stay away from Ohio and Indiana. And if your lifelong fantasy has been to chill on a couch in your front yard (hell, or back yard), head on over to Pennsylvania.
I stumbled into the house at around 11pm (12am Joy standard time/East Coast) to find everything moved around and stacked halfway to the ceiling in boxes. All the sheets and extra pillows and blankets were nowhere to be found, my sister was awol, and my parents were sleeping. At least the dogs were happy to see me. I slept on the couch after pulling all the boxes off of it and tried to wrap up in a couple ahfgans, which was pointless as they have a shitload of holes in them. My sister stumbled in and gave me a pillow (!) So my night got a little bit better, but man, it feels weird to be home. Our home is all messed up. Nearly everything has a pricetag on it or has been moved into a non-functional position in the house. While sorting stuff and commenting on if something is nice I am faced with an instant, "Do you want it? Take it with you." Wow...really? Everything? Yeah...
"Man, we can have movie night one more time and make popcorn..."
"Can't...Dad sold the tv and everything else is packed up."
"Oh, it'll be awesome to grill out one last time."
"Um...Dad sold the grill...And the patio set."
Damn.
I am making out like a bandit and feeling guilty at the same time. I don't want our house to get chopped up and sold off/given away.
While all of this moving crap sucks, it's nice to see the family again. My father freaked me out as he has changed his facial hair and I'm not used to looking at him yet. Moustaches are kinda creepy, yet it looks ok on him...I played cards and drank with my brothers and grilled out on a tiny ass charcoal grill. It feels good to be home.

Drunken Work is so much Better than Sober Life

So when is bacon and ham the same thing? I know that ham and bacon come from the same animal...but they are different right? I bought a turkey and HAM sandwich tonight from the only4AM deli counter (711) and was very unhappy to find that the sandwich had mayo (EEEEEW) and bacon (!?). In what way is this sandwich a turkey and ham sandwich? It sounds more like a turkey and bacon with mayo sandwich...I am a bit upset. It's a good thing I am slightly drunk and going to bed so I don't dwell on the unfairness of life based on the definition of a good sandwich.
Other than my poor choice in dinner, life is pretty good.
I am going home to "help" my parents sell my childhood home...aka cry and have a fit at them selling everything we've laid eyes on since I was wee little brat..."You can NOT have my barbie house for $10...FUCK OFF." I don't know how long my parents will be able to deal with me. I may have to bring my own liquor to deal, but I have to go back to say goodbye.
With all of that drama aside, I have to say life isn't half bad. I am looking for a career job to keep me sane and am kissing ass/waiting tables.
Tonight it worked out ok...thank God, because all week it was aweful...
I honestly think that drinking makes my personality so much better. I was given a couple drinks and man did I light up a room! I floated on air and made money. I think I need to bring my own liquor to the party from now on and become a bonified alcoholic waitress until I make it big.
Cheers.